Strangest gigs

Kingfan · by **Kingfan** » 2019-08-25 10:44 p.m.

Just played a charity fundraiser at the Bop Stop in Cleveland with the Townsmen Orchestra. Oldest big band in the city, formed in 1957. The Bop Stop is a great venue, BTW. The opening act was a Christian rapper. We backed him up on one song. A double bill with a rapper and a big band! We backed him up on one "song" in the key of B, five sharps. Strangest gig I've ever played. Next strangest I've done was a big band gig at a women's prison. What oddball gigs have the rest of you played?

Gary · by **Gary** » 2019-08-25 11:18 p.m.

Well . . there was that leper colony on Okinawa, I played. That was fun. Especially when the dumb band leader tried to get the audience to clap along.

u_2bobone · by **u_2bobone** » 2019-08-25 11:28 p.m.

I recall playing Scriabin's "Poem of Ecstasy" with full orchestra in front of an assemblage of The American Association of Psychiatrists as a panorama screen behind the orchestra changed colors according to the key in which the music was written. Apparently, Scriabin was affected by "synesthesia" which is the tendency of a person to see colors as they listen to music. Maybe that's why people say they feel "blue" when they hear the "Blues" ?

LeTromboniste · by **LeTromboniste** » 2019-08-26 12:35 a.m.

My first paid gig (I think) was at the grand parade of Montreal's Just for Laughs international comedy festival- the parade that year was emulating the annual mid-night/early-morning parade of the Basel carnaval (nice coincidence since I now live there!), with different boroughs presenting different tableaus under satire and social-critique themes - the one we were accompanying was a tableau on overconsumption and waste. The gig was a bizarre mess. We were hired as a trombone quartet to play video game themes while dressed in hazmat suits. First, as soon as we got to the rehearsal they realized the music they had asked us to pay really didn't fit their theme and vision, but they had no idea what to ask of us instead. One of us suggested playing something like Powerhouse. Then it turned out they didn't have suits large enough for some of us, so we were switched to the other costume of the tableau and were to instead wear trash bags with literal trash stapled all over them. When we got to the actual gig the next day we found out they had in the meantime hired another group (guitar, percussions, trumpet and saxophone IIRC) to supplement us because a trombone quartet really didn't fit the sound they had in mind (they got paid substantially less which I still feel shitty about all these years later). We then proceeded to play Powerhouse on an endless loop as loud as we could to be heard over the crowd and the next tableau's music (an 80-piece concert band), for two hours while walking around town, occasionally throwing in some weird atonal group improv or something. The noise was really loud and we could barely hear ourselves.

We were all quite tired at the end but one of my colleagues was completely dead and really completely unable to play anymore towards the end and was quite depressed that his shape wasn't as good as he thought...until he pushed his water key and probably around half a cup or more of condensation flowed and splashed about, and he realized he hadn't emptied his horn the whole time and that's why he was so much more tired!

At least we got to do it without wearing the garbage, but that's also a funny tale : the sets and costumes arrived at the event HQ the previous night and upon seeing two classrooms full of trash, the morning janitor proceeded to clear then out and throw the "garbage" into the dumpsters. By the time someone stopped them and explained those were actually costumes for the night's event, they had thrown out a couple dozens. They found us leftover tuxedo jackets from another tableau's costumes to wear over the event T-shirt. When we were told at the end that participants could keep their costumes, we were quite happy to bring home free tuxedo jackets rather than trash bags :lol:

Burgerbob · by **Burgerbob** » 2019-08-26 12:56 a.m.

I once recorded rock vocals for a McDonald's commercial for the Brazilian market. Yes, in English. Hopefully the files for that were permanently deleted.

I've also played a Purim gig (the Jewish holiday), which was horn section work for 3+ hours while 11-17 year old boys got very drunk on the dance floor. Can't wait for next year.

Pre59 · 2019-08-26 4:42 a.m.

I once played a big band gig for an annual charity, where most of the dancers were profoundly deaf. On top of the usual 16 pieces, at the edge of the stage there was a stout man banging 7 shades of **** out of a bass drum. Apparently the dancers could feel the beat quite clearly, as could we. Happy Days.

I got a call for a literally last minute gig at burlesque club, to play leads with a four piece band consisting of tbn, clt, banjo and drums, no bass. While dressed in a pith helmet, kaki shirt, shorts and sandals we played between the fake palm trees and dance routines..

bigbandbone · by **bigbandbone** » 2019-08-26 7:12 a.m.

Last winter a big band I play with got hired to play a job for a local charity. In the time between getting hired and the actual job the person responsible for advertising the event quit the organization. So there was no promotion of the event. We showed up, set up, played 3 sets to an empty house, got paid, and went home! Crazy!!!

norbie2018 · by **norbie2018** » 2019-08-26 8:06 a.m.

There's a big horse show in Madison, WI every year and I got hired to play with a brass quintet to provide background music while the horses rode. There was also an organist there and we switched off playing tunes. The strange part was where we played - we were on a platform in the middle of the ring. So while we played these horses trotted and sometimes galloped around us. It was a little unnerving at first but in the end was allot of fun.

timothy42b · by **timothy42b** » 2019-08-26 8:39 a.m.

[quote="norbie2018"]There's a big horse show in Madison, WI every year and I got hired to play with a brass quintet to provide background music while the horses rode. There was also an organist there and we switched off playing tunes. The strange part was where we played - we were on a platform in the middle of the ring. So while we played these horses trotted and sometimes galloped around us. It was a little unnerving at first but in the end was allot of fun.[/quote]

One year I attended that show and sat behind the organist. I was in awe of what he got out of that theater organ and how much the special effects and voices added to the experience. He played simple stuff but made it sound great.

The weird thing was those horses trotting around the ring, and periodically the crowd would go wild, but I couldn't see they'd done anything different.

hyperbolica · by **hyperbolica** » 2019-08-26 8:50 a.m.

I spent 4 years in a Navy fleet band. We did some odd jobs.

Once our 12 piece stage band was asked to play under a 8x10 tent on a 4x8 piece of plywood in a muddy field for someone's yard sale. The rules for service bands lead you into some odd situations.

I remember marching in a parade in the freezing rain with no one else in the parade and no spectators. That was a classic.

Every year we would schlep down to the oceanfront in Virginia Beach and play for the Norwegian Lady, a statue commemorating a shipwreck. Sometimes even the mayor didn't show up.

Not all of the weird gigs were stupid or bad. Some were fun but extremely wasteful.

Once they flew us to Hammondsport NY to a winery to play for the introduction of peach wine coolers. This reveals my age a little. The band of course was insanely drunk.

We flew 15 of us in a submarine hunter propeller plane with no seats or heat 11 hours to Iceland to play a 30 minute ceremony, and a jazz combo gig. We were there for a week until the sub hunter plane crew went back to Norfolk.

They flew us to Key West to play a change of command ceremony for a group of hydrofoils. They put us up in Navy ships tied up to the dock.

We went to Puerto Rico for another ceremony and party. The band was throwing-up drunk at a strip joint within an hour of the plane landing.

Plenty of odd stuff.

Gary · by **Gary** » 2019-08-26 1:01 p.m.

The military thing reminded me . . . I was in the Air Force and played a recruiting gig an the parking lot of a shopping center. Problem was, it was in southern California in the middle of the summer, mid-day gig, and with zero - zero - audience. They just walked right past us. Too hot.

Mikebmiller · by **Mikebmiller** » 2019-08-26 3:44 p.m.

Our Community Band got hired one time to play some sort of event at the BMW visitor's center outside the plant in SC. We were told 6-7. Apparently, the guests were told 7-8. So we played a band concert to an empty building and went home.

My quintet was hired to play a weekday lunch concert at a branch of the county library. This was a series sponsored by the local orchestra. And they managed to hire a guitar player for the same gig. So we both showed up to play the concert. Since we had 5 and he was by himself, we won out and played the gig. To an audience of 6.

I was backing up an Elvis impersonator (I mean Elvis Performance Artist) once and a lady took off her bra and threw it on the stage.

Lots of concerts where we never achieved what I call "bandlibrium." That's where the size of the audience at least matches the size of the band.

JohnL · by **JohnL** » 2019-08-26 3:59 p.m.

I once played a community band gig that was for a sort of grand opening/sales pitch for a newly opened, high end "adult community". Crickets. It was pretty much just us and the staff and maybe a half dozen potential customers. On the plus side, the dessert chef from their on-site restaurant had been working all day (maybe more) on a bunch of goodies for the expected throng. After we finished, he came over and practically begged us to have at the dessert table so his work wouldn't go to waste.

I also played a concert under a 26' (~8 m) tall statue of Marilyn Monroe (in her iconic pose from "The Seven Year Itch") in downtown Palm Springs.

cmcslide · by **cmcslide** » 2019-08-26 8:26 p.m.

I played a big band gig for a faith healer. He opened the event by singing about four or five Elvis and Frank Sinatra songs, then spent the next three and a half hours preaching and "healing" people. We then came back out and played a couple more songs for him to sing and it was over. The whole time, the keyboard player (who traveled with this gentleman) was noodling music that sounded exactly like the music from "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?"

Kingfan · by **Kingfan** » 2019-08-26 10:15 p.m.

Great stories! The prison gig was a low security women's prison in Indianapolis. They checked our bags and cases on the way in. We walked across what looked like a college quad to the chapel/performance hall. Some of the inmates sat at the back and looked bored, others looked a little rough, but a few had done their best to look good and sat up front. No problems, but boy was I happy to get out the front gate after it was over.

Jimkinkella · by **Jimkinkella** » 2019-08-26 10:58 p.m.

Top 40 horn section at a swinger’s convention.

And no, not like the movie.

Yes, we did play “Leave your hat on”

Vegastokc · by **Vegastokc** » 2019-08-27 10:29 a.m.

This is one of the best threads ever. I could read these all day. :lol:

I hope many others contribute some great stories.

Here are just a few quick ones of my own, although not nearly as good as what is already posted:

My first paying "gig" I was a freshman in high school. Me and a fellow bone player (HS junior) played Christmas duets in the living room of a model home. Maybe six couples came by in 5 hours. Paper towels as a spittoon on the brand new white carpet.

In college, a 20-30 piece portion of the pep band would be hired for conventions, private parties etc. We coined ourselves the Gig Sluts as we would be paid in anything from cash to hamburgers.:

One time we marched into a room in our full ~~[color=#FF0000]~~red uniforms to play the Notre Dame fight song for key note speaker Coach Lou Holtz. We were not anywhere near the state of Indiana.

Playing Consumer Electronics Show convention in Las Vegas outside Microsoft area. Played Beach Boy's Barbara Ann over and over and over and over...

It was Microsoft's rollout of their brand new, ground breaking operating system of the future: Microsoft BOB.

Get it? --> "Bob bob bob, bob bob a-ran" LOL

One that literally paid in hamburgers: Playing on a rickety wood awning over the entrance of a bar. There were moments we thought for sure it was going to collapse.

What can I say, we were in college and a free burger is a free burger. ;)

timothy42b · by **timothy42b** » 2019-08-27 11:06 a.m.

Most money I ever made with a polka band, we were playing a wedding dance in some hall in northern Wisconsin.

This old guy kept at us to play some rock and roll. Not really our thing, but he tipped us a couple of times, and then someone else whispered to us that he was from Chicago, he was "connected," and it would really be a good idea to do what he wanted. There was one youngster in his party and she kept nagging him.

So we dug out Proud Mary, trombone lead.

He thanked us and tipped us again to NOT play any more rock and roll. I'm not sure if it was my playing......well doesn't matter. With his tips I made twice the normal rate.

Pre59 · by **Pre59** » 2019-08-27 6:25 p.m.

When I was in an army band, we turned up one afternoon at a stately home to rehearse for a marching display to be performed later that evening. No problems. But come the evening there was only one source of light which was a spotlight, a "super trooper". Unfortunately it was set at one end of the green and eye level, which meant that we were blinded marching towards it and could only see black and spots away from it.

This resulted in musicians ending up in the wrong rows, lots of screaming and shouting, shoving, unveiled threats etc.

A week later a letter appeared on the notice board from the former prime minister thanking the band for a "very entertaining display"...

u_2bobone · by **u_2bobone** » 2019-08-27 7:24 p.m.

How could I have forgotten that wonderful occasion when I performed, as a member of TUSAB in Washington, D.C. at Fort Myer ,VA for the installation of a new base commander. We went through our paces like clockwork and were pleased that nothing had gone wrong. The commander of TUSAB received a letter from the new base commander several days later commending the band on its performance, but with one "Very Military Improvement" to what he otherwise considered to be quite wonderful. He thought it would look much better if somehow the trombone section [in the front row, of course --- ] could arrange to move our slides to go IN and OUT at the same time !

I know that this story is sometimes regarded as being apocryphal, but it is true --- much to both my total delight and to my total embarrassment ! What a time it was !

Doug_Elliott · by **Doug_Elliott** » 2019-08-28 4:37 a.m.

So many stories from military band gigs...

It was 1993. I was in the Air Force Band, Airmen of Note. We sometimes had to augment the Ceremonial Band for funerals, parades, or ceremonies. The new Secretary of the Air Force, Sheila Widnall, was being sworn in and the full band was at the Pentagon, trombones in the front row. A man got up from the audience and walked up to talk to the drum major, who then pointed at me. He was one of my mouthpiece customers and just wanted to come over and say hello.

Geordie · by **Geordie** » 2019-08-28 9:20 a.m.

Did a South American style carnival parade, complete with tunics and head gear, around the inside and outside of a large children’s hospital last week. Two trombones, three trumpets, sax and electric bass player (back pack style combo amp) continued playing and marched into a lift (elevator) much to the surprise and appreciation of patient, nurses, surgeons and visitors in the lift/elevator. They were not as surprised as the people waiting to enter the lift when the doors opened and the ensemble marched out without dropping a beat.

LeTromboniste · by **LeTromboniste** » 2019-08-28 12:26 p.m.

And a different kind of strange :

A concert band I used to play in got a summer gig in a small town festival. It was raining and storming like crazy but luckily the gig was in the church, so we stayed dry and all was fine. Except we got to the last piece, big heavy piece, we get out of the slow section in the middle, then the big build up to the huge, loud, fast finale and of course the trombones come in just in the last few bars of the build up to announce the climax. Well the moment we played our first note the power goes out, nobody can see their music anymore or the conductor. Somehow the band doesn't stop playing, and the adrenaline gets us through the very technical passages of the big finale. The piece ends with a big clash. Power comes back up in the moment after we finish but before the audience explodes in applause.

That same band had played a gig the year before where they played the piece Cloudburst and a spotlight literally exploded above the band in the middle of the piece (with the hot glass shrapnel punching holes in the timpani skins). I guess that band just had a very powerful karma :lol:

Pre59 · 2019-08-28 6:01 p.m.

I once had to play a Bb bass fanfare trumpet with its characteristic long bell that the regimental colours hang from. This makes it extremely front heavy.

Arriving at the venue, we were lead up several flights of stairs, then up a ladder into an attic, across some duck boards then out onto a roof. We then had to walk around the edge of the building until we arrived at turreted area, which was very pre "health and safety". The resipiants of our fanfare were about 5 stories below. The turrets were five feet high and gaps between them level with the floor, so not wishing in such a newsworthy way we instinctively avoided these gaps, which is NOT what the Director of Music safely down below wanted. Needless to say, we played in a pathetic manner, behind the turrets, then sat quietly in our shame on the bus home afterwards, but living to tell the tale.

The moral, have great respect for trumpeters playing fanfares from very high places in old buildings.

u_2bobone · by **u_2bobone** » 2019-08-29 12:07 a.m.

Ah ! Herald Trumpets ! One of my side duties when in TUSAB was to play "G" bass herald trumpet in their ensemble. All of the service bands stationed in Washington, D.C.: Army, Marines, Navy and Air Force played concerts during the Summer months on a Stage/Barge anchored at the bass of the steps that lead to the Lincoln Memorial. It was a very cramped affair with no extra space, no real backstage or facilities that one would usually expect to find. The concerts always began with the National Anthem augmented by the Herald Trumpets --- a dazzling display, indeed ! Well -- I had to play the Anthem with The Herald Trumpets and then immediately join the band as a bass trombonist for the opening piece. What to do with the lanky "G" bass Herald Trumpet ? I arranged for one of the chorus members [The U.S. Army Chorus was a fabulous group !] to stand it in my case which was in a corner of the barge. Everything went as planned until the end of the concert when I was collecting my music, mutes and bass trombone and I heard a loud voice yelling ," Whose Herald Trumpet is this !". It seems that my Herald Trumpet was not placed where I had instructed it to be placed and the Commanding Officer who had just conducted the concert had stepped on it in the dark backstage area. He stomped on it in such a way that he bent the long bell right in the middle at about a 45 degree angle. I explained my dilemma, which was accepted grudgingly. I don't think that he ever realized that he made musical history that evening by creating the world's first "Dizzy Up Do" Herald Trumpet !

Pre59 · 2019-08-29 5:28 a.m.

I was working on a small cruise ship in the Caribbean, and one night during the modest show there was a magic act and a hypnosis act, performing in that order.

The Magic act included doves and all went well. Then on came the hypnosis act, to which we played a very slow song called "Dream", not the Buddy Holly one but this one.. <YOUTUBE id="2HzMk1BMPq0">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2HzMk1BMPq0</YOUTUBE> for the entirety of his act. The three horns shared the melody, and one night while playing we became aware of a kerfuffle happening behind us in the dressing room. A dove had escaped and was now flying around the room until it eventually landed on my slide, which just happened to be stationary during a long note of my solo. The rest of the band, also playing by ear and seeing what had happened, just "froze" the chord and rhythm at that exact point, then picked up the beat as the bird flew off as though nothing had happened..

We also played an arrangement of "At the Jazz Band Ball". This old Dixieland tune features two prominent bass drum beats, played on the last beat of the 2nd bar to the first beat of the 3rd bar. This band would sometimes, because of reasons known only to itself would add two extra beats, not only during the melody but during the jazz solo's and sometimes even while the punters were dancing.

hyperbolica · by **hyperbolica** » 2019-08-29 11:29 a.m.

When I was in high school I got a summer gig at an amusement park called Santas Workshop on Whiteface Mountain near Lake Placid NY. It was our job to march around the park in elf costumes (looked like pajamas) and play Christmas tunes in what passes for warm weather up there. When we sat down in the gazebo to play our show with singers, we played along with a recording to augment our 8 piece band. It was Christmas time all summer long.

townbandtrombone · by **townbandtrombone** » 2019-08-29 10:24 p.m.

The "elves" used to drive around the Adirondacks in tiny Toyota pick-up trucks, too cute! 30 years ago our town band decided to have a floating concert down the CT river in party barges lashed together. No one calculated that with our slow speed we would reach our landing site way after dark. The river is flood-controlled with many sand bars at lower water level. With the trombones in front, I was certain we would run some ground, and be crushed by the tubas before we landed.

timothy42b · by **timothy42b** » 2019-08-30 8:52 a.m.

[quote="2bobone"]Ah ! Herald Trumpets !

The concerts always began with the National Anthem augmented by the Herald Trumpets --- a dazzling display, indeed !
[/quote]

Huh. Years ago I was at an Army conference, opened with a recording of the National Anthem, and it was an arrangement I'd never heard. It had lots of high trumpet and horn. I wonder if that could have been the same arrangement.

I've searched for it since, and never run into anyone who knew what I was talking about. I even asked up at Fort Myer to see if they knew.

brtnats · by **brtnats** » 2019-09-02 10:09 a.m.

Ska band gig at a punk rock festival outside at midnight, the week of Halloween, with a giant Satan head printed on a sign behind me. Very very trippy.

StevenC · by **StevenC** » 2019-09-02 9:42 p.m.

Maybe the strangest gig I've played was a marriage proposal. This guy wrote a nice little folk pop song about his woman and their life together. He had a friend write an accompanying horn arrangement. So we had a couple of trombones, saxophones, flute, clarinet. It was all quite cute, and I hope not preserved for posterity. I hope the couple is still happy together.

torobone · by **torobone** » 2019-09-03 10:52 a.m.

I played for the (deep breath, even while typing):

The 1st Annual China Canada Television Festival Award Ceremony

We were broadcast from Toronto and shown on one of the biggest Chinese networks. One could argue that it was one of the largest audiences in the world! Now to the details:

The entire show was in Chinese, which made it impossible to remain interested in the proceedings. Even the director spoke no English. We had a number of charts we wanted to play, but rather than worry about copyright and royalties, we played 5 fanfares that were written for the gig over and over.

Nevertheless, the hosts were gracious, and the honorarium left $5 after we paid for the the expensive downtown hotel parking. It was like many military gigs: glad I served, but I am not anxious to repeat the experience.

sporto · by **sporto** » 2019-09-04 9:51 p.m.

6 piece New Orleans jazz band at a Buddhist wake. The deceased was a fan of ours and wanted us at his wake and sure enough his daughter followed through.

u_2bobone · by **u_2bobone** » 2019-09-04 11:22 p.m.

Melina Mercourie was the Cultural Ambassador of Greece when Misitislav Rostropovich was the conductor of the National Symphony Orchestra in Washington, D.C. A concert took place during which Madame Mercourie was in the audience. The conductor was anxious to curry favor with the Cultural Ambassador and so he included the very difficult "Dances of Galanta" of Kodaly to demonstrate the abilities of the orchestra in hopes that she would invite the orchestra to the Greece Summer Festivals in Athens as had happened when Antal Dorati was the principal conductor of the orchestra several years prior. Firstly, Rostropovich totally underestimated the rehearsal time required to have the piece "well in hand" for the performance and caused total conniptions within the orchestra management when he ran an hour and an half into overtime in order to have the piece in any condition to consider it to be "well in hand". During the concert, things progressed quite normally until it got to the "encores". Rostropovich returned to the stage and announced that an encore would be played "In the honor of Melina Mercouri" ! He dropped the baton and away we went ---- through a deceivingly tuneful composition --- which was in reality a VERY difficult piece ---- ! Everything went well until the very end ---- when the composition ended ---- but the conductor DIDN'T ! To everyone's astonishment --- after the piece had ended ---- the conductor continued conducting for several measures more ---- with no musicians playing ---- just the noise of himself making SCHHHHing noises which seemed to satisfy his perceptions of what was happening. The audience --- as usual --- applauded --- because THEY weren't paying attention . The orchestra looked ashamed --- as usual --- because they WERE paying attention! Art walks a "Tight-rope" between "Great Art" and "Great Comedy" and it depends which side of the tight-rope you fall off of which determines what the end result is. Methinks the end result of this example is quite obvious. Carry on !

Vegastokc · by **Vegastokc** » 2019-09-05 12:29 p.m.

So no trip to Athens , then? LOL

Mikebmiller · by **Mikebmiller** » 2019-09-18 10:05 a.m.

So last night I showed up at a retirement home to play with the brass band I just joined about 6 weeks ago. I was the first one there. I walked into the reception area and asked "where is the concert?" The lady at the desk knew nothing about a concert. It seems that the activities director had a family emergency and hadn't told anyone we were coming. So 30 people with horns and drums were descending upon this place and no one knew what to do with us. They finally managed to get someone on the phone and confirm that we were supposed to be there and we ended up playing for a less than sell out crowd of about 20 people.

Vegastokc · by **Vegastokc** » 2019-09-18 12:42 p.m.

"A gig is a gig is a gig"

-Unknown

BHolleyBrass · by **BHolleyBrass** » 2019-09-24 5:57 p.m.

I played in a circus band a few years back and the bandstand floor was at the perfect height for the elephant to reach into the set with her trunk. She only managed to knock over one alto sax, thankfully.

StevenC · by **StevenC** » 2019-09-24 9:51 p.m.

[quote="Mikebmiller"]So last night I showed up at a retirement home to play with the brass band I just joined about 6 weeks ago.[/quote]

Some of my most and least enjoyable gigs have been at retirement homes

Gary · by **Gary** » 2019-09-25 11:30 a.m.

[quote="BHolleyBrass"]I played in a circus band a few years back and the bandstand floor was at the perfect height for the elephant to reach into the set with her trunk. She only managed to knock over one alto sax, thankfully.[/quote]

That reminds me, I played in a Barnum&Bailey/Ringling parade. Huge. We followed the elephants. Not nice!

harrisonreed · by **harrisonreed** » 2019-09-25 6:54 p.m.

The weirdest gig I ever played was a 5x7 parade formation for the construction of a gentleman's house. It was from a charity that builds houses for vets who got disabled by IEDs -- noble charity, great day, especially for his family and friends. The parade route was about 100ft long, and we were the only band - formation for that matter - so we marched the full length of his front yard, did a counter march, did another counter march, and by the time we made it back to the end of the parade route, we were still on the first strain of the first march. The end of the parade route was a Bojanglés Chicken inflatable archway and we were given boxes of fried chicken and biscuits as we marched through. The house was the only house on the entire street. The thank you speech was inspiring, but did include statements such as: "one of my big wish list items had been that Bojanglés [Fried Chicken] would be within viewing distance of my home (indeed it was, I could see its beautiful steeple over the trees in his back yard), and boy did these folks deliver on that!"

We played a few tunes for the crowd in his yard, and then ate about 50 chickens and an entire field of wheat in biscuit form. Then we got commemorative coins with a picture of his house on them. Weirdest and most rewarding gig I ever did play.

Another weird and awesome performance just happened last month. The brass band played for a festival in Tsugaru, Japan. It started out normally. We played our set and meet a bunch of local people. At the end of the festival we got front row seats and watched them light a giant row of horses on fire in effigy while strange 60's art noveau music played and a traditional Japanese female singer sang a song of lament. It ended with the longest and most insane firework display I have ever seen.

sungfw · by **sungfw** » 2019-10-06 7:16 a.m.

[quote="harrisonreed"]The weirdest gig I ever played was a 5x7 parade formation for the construction of a gentleman's house. It was from a charity that builds houses for vets who got disabled by IEDs -- noble charity, great day, especially for his family and friends. The parade route was about 100ft long, and we were the only band - formation for that matter - so we marched the full length of his front yard, did a counter march, did another counter march, and by the time we made it back to the end of the parade route, we were still on the first strain of the first march. The end of the parade route was a Bojanglés Chicken inflatable archway and we were given boxes of fried chicken and biscuits as we marched through. The house was the only house on the entire street. The thank you speech was inspiring, but did include statements such as: "one of my big wish list items had been that Bojanglés [Fried Chicken] would be within viewing distance of my home (indeed it was, I could see its beautiful steeple over the trees in his back yard), and boy did these folks deliver on that!"

We played a few tunes for the crowd in his yard, and then ate about 50 chickens and an entire field of wheat in biscuit form. Then we got commemorative coins with a picture of his house on them. Weirdest and most rewarding gig I ever did play.

Another weird and awesome performance just happened last month. The brass band played for a festival in Tsugaru, Japan. It started out normally. We played our set and meet a bunch of local people. At the end of the festival we got front row seats and watched them light a giant row of horses on fire in effigy while strange 60's art noveau music played and a traditional Japanese female singer sang a song of lament. It ended with the longest and most insane firework display I have ever seen.[/quote]

So .... not the dancing J-pop (or was it K-pop) mime TV gig? :biggrin: (Or was that someone else???)

harrisonreed · by **harrisonreed** » 2019-10-06 7:53 a.m.

This beat that one. That K-Pop/enka one was another weird gig in Asia. But that $450 thoh....

sungfw · by **sungfw** » 2019-10-06 5:17 p.m.

[quote="harrisonreed"]This beat that one. That K-Pop/enka one was another weird gig in Asia. But that $450 thoh....[/quote]

Ah, so ... $450 = Won big gig? :twisted:

harrisonreed · by **harrisonreed** » 2019-10-06 6:59 p.m.

[quote="sungfw"]<QUOTE author="harrisonreed" post_id="95463" time="1570362793" user_id="3642">
This beat that one. That K-Pop/enka one was another weird gig in Asia. But that $450 thoh....[/quote]

Ah, so ... $450 = Won big gig? :twisted:
</QUOTE>

Guess I'll hit the dusty trail :(

Tarkus697 · by **Tarkus697** » 2019-10-14 3:21 p.m.

While I was in HS, we won the opportunity to record marching music that was used for a video game commercial, specifically TV Sports Football for the Turbografx-16.

About 2 dozen of us were cherry picked from the marching band to head to Electric Ladyland Studios to do the recording. They fed us quality NY deli sandwiches which we thought was the greatest thing in the world. At our age we didn't even know the importance of Electric Ladyland Studios in the history of music.

Here's a link to the ad:

<YOUTUBE id="gr87Se0Xy0M">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gr87Se0Xy0M</YOUTUBE>

Pre59 · by **Pre59** » 2019-10-14 3:49 p.m.

I borrowed a sousaphone to play for a boat show at Plymouth UK harbour marina. A press photographer thought that it would be a great idea if the (large) four piece band sat in a small inflatable dingy to pose for a picture. I sat on the stern trying to balance the weight of the instrument against the wind, and the motion of the water which was only inches from coming over the transom of the under inflated craft..

Gary · by **Gary** » 2019-10-15 10:50 a.m.

Played a gig in the winter in Germany. It was so cold, I wanted to cancel before we even played. A band board member told me that we had to play a minimum of 30 minutes or we wouldn't get paid and we needed the money.

After about the third number, the flutes stopped playing. When I asked "why", they showed me frozen tubes of ice they pulled out of their horns, So I excused them from the gig.

During the next tune, the saxes stopped playing. I looked at their horns and they had frozen water coming out of the tone holes and, likewise, couldn't play. I looked at the band, and the board member, and said, "I don't care what the contract says, we're out of here", and packed up.

An irony was that, as I was leaving, I saw scattered groups of band members gathered around Gluehwine (hot spiced wine) tents, finding their own way to warming up! Germans, LOL.

mbarbier · by **mbarbier** » 2019-10-29 6:26 p.m.

There have been a bunch of strange ones, but I have one favorite:

A few years back a group I play with did a show with a rock band at the Natural History Museum here in LA. It was in one of the animal halls and was just brutally boomy with a few brass, none the less a rock band and the the whole ensemble amplified...except for the two trombones. Then a contingent of the USC marching band joined for the last tune. It was pretty out...though the open bar in the green room maybe amplified that...(we couldn't bring drinks into the museum but we could bring coffee so the bar just so happened to serve drinks to musicians in coffee cups....

The strangest part of the gig was that the ensemble was asked to play an acoustic set in the dinosaur hall before hand. Where we were joined by a life size T-Rex puppet that sang along... ~~[url]~~https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDTiFfrswVA My kid is currently in the dinosaur phase pretty strongly, so wish I could do that gig again now!

WilliamLang · by **WilliamLang** » 2019-11-22 8:20 p.m.

Let's see...

about two months ago I played in a Planet Hollywood in Times Square, dressed in traditional American marching outfits (with the hat and the plume and everything!) while performing American patriotic military music for a packed house of Germans.

that's when i knew i had made it to the big time

GMB · by **GMB** » 2019-11-24 4:50 p.m.

Funeral in a blizzard with a 6-piece brass ensemble. The tubist didn't stand a chance, next with frozen valves were the baritone and then the second trumpet. My slide froze near the coda of the march but I'd stopped playing from the 8th measure because I was trying so hard not to laugh.

I didn't play this one but I once booked a string quartet for a BDSM festival a former classmate was helping organize.

harrisonreed · by **harrisonreed** » 2019-11-24 5:19 p.m.

[quote="GMB"]Funeral in a blizzard with a 6-piece brass ensemble. The tubist didn't stand a chance, next with frozen valves were the baritone and then the second trumpet. My slide froze near the coda of the march but I'd stopped playing from the 8th measure because I was trying so hard not to laugh.

I didn't play this one but I once booked a string quartet for a BDSM festival a former classmate was helping organize.[/quote]

That sounds strangely fitting for a funeral.

Tromboned · by **Tromboned** » 2019-11-26 8:59 a.m.

My college marching band has an alumni group that plays pep band type events through out the year to raise scholarship money for the current students. Naturally we are the busiest in the fall during football season. We typically play weddings,birthdays, graduations, business events and pep rally's for organizations associated with the university when the regular band can't make it. While weddings are common, we were invited to play at a bachelorette party. Twenty band members showed up at a private residence where we gathered in the front dining room. We then paraded to the back of the home much to the surprise of the group of young ladies. We played for about 30 min and then let them continue on with their evening.

Vegastokc · by **Vegastokc** » 2019-11-26 11:38 a.m.

[quote="Tromboned"]...we were invited to play at a bachelorette party. Twenty band members showed up at a private residence where we gathered in the front dining room. We then paraded to the back of the home much to the surprise of the group of young ladies. We played for about 30 min and then let them continue on with their evening.[/quote]

Sounds like the bride's father has some nice disposable booster income. :good:

Also, I think the young ladies' surprise might have been due to them expecting some other type of entertainment to march in. :shock:

harrisonreed · by **harrisonreed** » 2020-02-05 9:58 a.m.

<ATTACHMENT filename="1580914403876.jpg" index="0">~~[attachment=0]~~1580914403876.jpg</ATTACHMENT>

Just had one tonight! After the first minute, each section was at least a quarter tone apart with a center around A415. Then the saxes froze and stopped working. It was awesome, and really fun, actually! You can see that, even near the beginning of the set our trumpet players had about two inches of snow that had fallen on their hats!

The tourists who only knew about canned music and canned performances looked confused, but the people who had worked out that we were having minor technical hurdles stuck it out with us!

Ted · by **Ted** » 2020-02-06 3:42 a.m.

Awesome shot!

Gary · by **Gary** » 2020-02-06 11:26 a.m.

As just the opposite, I played a gig in Palm Springs in the summer and it was literally 110 degrees in the shade. To boot, it was in a Wanger portable stage trailer. Somebody's idea of a good idea. There was no ventilation. The first piece wasn't even finished, when most of the band members' shirts were soaked through. Gad, it was bad.

KingOfDreamland · by **KingOfDreamland** » 2020-02-06 2:58 p.m.

[quote="Gary"]As just the opposite, I played a gig in Palm Springs in the summer and it was literally 110 degrees in the shade. To boot, it was in a Wanger portable stage trailer. Somebody's idea of a good idea. There was no ventilation. The first piece wasn't even finished, when most of the band members' shirts were soaked through. Gad, it was bad.[/quote]

Between extreme heat and extreme cold, I'm not sure which is worse, but I've been through both. When I was in high school, we got to take a trip to Orlando to march in the Magic Kingdom parade. This was in early June. We have some relatively hot summers in Nebraska, but definitely not Florida hot. The day we marched in the parade it was well over 100 degrees with typical Florida humidity, and I don't know how long the Magic Kingdom parade route is, but that day it felt like we were marching the Boston Marathon route. It also didn't help that our uniforms were mostly black. There was another band from another town in Nebraska right behind us, and they had at least one member pass out right in the middle of the parade. When we finished the parade, they had a huge table filled with cups of water, probably big enough for a hundred-piece band, and we had 40 kids. We finished off the water immediately.

On Christmas Eve a couple years ago, I was doing some busking (does that still count as a gig? :D ) with our small low brass ensemble in downtown Omaha. The daytime temps weren't bad, so I'd been wearing a hooded sweatshirt and relying on the fact that I'm fat to keep me warm. Well, our luck playing downtown in Omaha was always that no matter how warm it was and how calm the wind was, it'd always drop about 20 degrees and the wind would pick up about 15 MPH as soon as we set up to play. That was the case that night. From the time when we unloaded the instruments from our cars to the time when we put them together, the mouthpieces had gotten to the point where they were too cold to play. Luckily we didn't have any frozen instruments to deal with, but by the time we got done all our faces were about as red as the Nebraska script across the front of the hoodie I wore that night. Probably not nearly as cold as some of the other gigs mentioned above, but definitely as cold as I'd ever want to deal with while playing a gig.

dukesboneman · by **dukesboneman** » 2020-02-07 9:18 a.m.

Well, where do I start,

We played a gig for the Canadian Republican party in Ontario, Canada. We were a classic R&B/Soul band and we played opposite Hew haw news man - Gordy Tapp in a huge Airplane hanger. Thousands were expected/150 showed up.

Same Band - we played at a Holiday Inn quite a bit 1) one time the club was packed with people at a "Adult Friend

Finder/Swinger" Meet & greet. They all had name tags with their name and what they were in to.

2) as we were setting up one night we noticed that the club was packed with women. A women`s bowling

tournament was staying at the hotel. They couldn`t keep their tops on.

3)Playing with a German Band at the Milwaukee October Fest . We had about 4 thousand people watching the band.

There is nothing as weird as watching around 1,000 people doing the chicken dance

4) Playing a Dixieland gig at an Apple Festival. "Home of the World`s largest Apple Pie" It was HUGE. Someone had

the bright idea as to set the Band up almost next to the big pie. Nice idea on paper but.. We had a real hard time

taking a breath because every BEE in a 5 county area was hanging around the pie.

5) Got hired to back an Elvis Impersonator. Big event - Cocktail hour/Dinner/silent auction/ speeches - then Elvis.

Well by the time we got around to playing , people were getting tired and leaving. Elvis was pissed off that they

were leaving so he starts yelling at them and chasing after them to get them to stay. Awkward!

And the list goes on & on & on

Bonearzt · by **Bonearzt** » 2020-02-07 10:21 a.m.

Played a biker picnic an got flashed by several "curvey" women....played a polka band on Thanksgiving on a balcony overlooking the parade route, played TOWARDS the bands that didn't play as they went by, LOTS of good food & drink PLUS pay on that gig!!!

Did a recording session that paid in $5 bills, they emphasized that we shouldn't ask questions about the pay....

Interesting reads here!!

Eric

Kingfan · by **Kingfan** » 2020-02-07 10:29 p.m.

In high school, marched halftime on a new and wet football field. There was so much sticky mud everybody lost at least one shoe. The game couldn't start the second half until all those shoes had been found and taken off (or should I say, out of) the field.

JBone · by **JBone** » 2020-02-08 8:02 a.m.

A few come immediately to mind, though nowhere near the level of some of the ones described here:

Playing a wedding and the couple getting hitched requested "Heard It Through The Grapevine" of all things. Instrumental version, so no lyrics to be worried about, but still a bit odd.

Another wedding gig, the local sportsball team was in the national playoffs. So, they roll a television into the corner of the room for people to watch the game while the band's playing, with the guests cranking the volume on the TV and glaring at the band, since the people holding the pursestrings hadn't told the band to stop playing.

Then of course there's the parade gig for some manner of Italian religious holiday at 11AM in 85+ degree weather in late June every year, in suits and shirts mind. Thankfully a pretty short walk, but between the sweating, the reasonably difficult music (italian marches), and the metal you were rubbing on your face, it failed to be the most comfortable gig I've ever played (and the pay was almost enough to get your shirt dry-cleaned afterward).

Easter Brass Quintet gig accompanying a choir. The organist swapped from organ to piano for the second to last song, which would be fine...... but the piano and organ were tuned about 20 cents apart from one another leading to frantic instrument adjustments for that song, and then again when she switched back.

SwissTbone · by **SwissTbone** » 2020-02-08 8:32 a.m.

Playing solos with organ at a wedding in the church. Met the organist 5 minutes before downtime, so no rehearsal. That wouldn't have been a problem. But the the organist told me he just play tested the organ and he wouldn't be able to play any songs with a C or a Bb in it because those notes sounded awful.

So basically we played 6 songs each of us two never played. Tried to play them together while 300 people (and a lot of trombonists) where listening.

I survived it.

cmcslide · by **cmcslide** » 2020-02-08 9:36 a.m.

[quote="JBone"]A few come immediately to mind, though nowhere near the level of some of the ones described here:

Playing a wedding and the couple getting hitched requested "Heard It Through The Grapevine" of all things. Instrumental version, so no lyrics to be worried about, but still a bit odd.[/quote]

Played a wedding with a dixieland band where the leader wanted to start the gig with "Who's Sorry Now!" We asked him if he was sure that he wanted to start with that one and he goes, "Why not? It's a great tune!"

deanmccarty · by **deanmccarty** » 2020-03-14 9:45 p.m.

This was strange AND gross... I got called for a variety band gig for a private club out in the sticks... all was normal until about 11:00... they locked the doors and someone got on a mic and said “It is time...”. Then... they all went at it... it was a swingers club, and we were on until 1:00... while all of that was going on... <EMOJI seq="1f633" tseq="1f633">😳</EMOJI>

Mikebmiller · by **Mikebmiller** » 2020-03-14 10:58 p.m.

[quote="deanmccarty"]This was strange AND gross... I got called for a variety band gig for a private club out in the sticks... all was normal until about 11:00... they locked the doors and someone got on a mic and said “It is time...”. Then... they all went at it... it was a swingers club, and we were on until 1:00... while all of that was going on... <EMOJI seq="1f633" tseq="1f633">😳</EMOJI>[/quote]

Like they said on Seinfeld, there’s good naked and bad naked. Sounds like some bad naked,

deanmccarty · by **deanmccarty** » 2020-03-15 1:23 p.m.

[quote="Mikebmiller"]Sounds like some bad naked,[/quote]

It’s etched into my mind forever...

Mikebmiller · by **Mikebmiller** » 2020-03-15 7:50 p.m.

I think I would have been outa there pretty quick.

whitbey · by **whitbey** » 2020-03-16 1:11 p.m.

[quote="deanmccarty"]This was strange AND gross... I got called for a variety band gig for a private club out in the sticks... all was normal until about 11:00... they locked the doors and someone got on a mic and said “It is time...”. Then... they all went at it... it was a swingers club, and we were on until 1:00... while all of that was going on... <EMOJI seq="1f633" tseq="1f633">😳</EMOJI>[/quote]

What is funny is when you see your kids teacher or someone you know at an event like this. :eek:

MagnumH · by **MagnumH** » 2020-05-06 11:57 a.m.

NOLA-style brass bands get into a lot of weird places (often transport related) but three particular gigs stand out.

Most recently, my band played the Record Store Crawl in Rochester, NY. The majority of the gig had us crammed into a school bus with the attendees, the sousaphone scraping the roof of the bus, drummer playing snare on his lap, etc.

A few years back, a different brass band played a "safari" in the Scottish highlands. One of the spots was on a vintage train, at the back of the cart, playing horns out the windows while the whole cart went nuts.<ATTACHMENT filename="IMG_0692.jpeg" index="0">~~[attachment=0]~~IMG_0692.jpeg</ATTACHMENT>

The one that stands out the most is disturbingly similar to deanmccarty's.

A different brass band again, at a private party, in a quiet cul-de-sac in rural Scotland, with maybe 50 very scantily clad ladies, and maybe 5 fuller-clad gents. Lovely party, lots of food and drink. But also a 2 foot long double ended youknowwhat sitting next to the breadknife. We played a 1hr set, and about half way through, the few clothing items remaining on the partygoers were shorn, and it became a full on XXX party affair.

We finished up our full set, and they actually really dug the music as well. Then we huddled together, said our goodbyes, and drove away, innocence forever lost. We also left a sax player behind.

StevenC · by **StevenC** » 2020-05-06 9:15 p.m.

So I just remembered the time we got hired to "crash" a wedding reception. (I guess it was cheaper than hiring a band for the full time.) We stormed into the room at some predetermined time, and started playing "Love Shack". When we left, half the wedding party followed us, so we had to keep playing through town.

rmb796 · by **rmb796** » 2020-05-17 2:55 p.m.

I played a big band gig at a 4H fair once. We shared a tent with a group of farmers that were shearing sheep.

The temperature was about 100 and the flies were so thick I couldn't hardly distinguish the notes from the flies.

On top of all that , I was fighting the flu..., between the noise of the people, the Baaah of the sheep , sound of the clippers, and the heat, I barely made it through the gig. I still remember this one even though it was 40 years ago!!

Another time a lady was dancing and her partner let go of her arm when he swung her around and she fell into the first row of sax players knocking everything down.

Was playing a New Years eve gig with a rock band and everyone in the place got so drunk they sent us home BEFORE Midnight !

Geordie · by **Geordie** » 2020-05-18 3:24 a.m.

Brass band, booked to parade through a housing area in West end of Newcastle upon Tyne. Arrive to find all housing in the area demolished but pavements/sidewalks and roads intact. To be sure of payment we did the March and playing. Think traditionally uniformed British brass band marching through a deserted 28 Days Later or post bombing film set and you get the idea.

JohnL · by **JohnL** » 2020-05-18 8:14 a.m.

[quote="Geordie"]Brass band, booked to parade through a housing area in West end of Newcastle upon Tyne. Arrive to find all housing in the area demolished but pavements/sidewalks and roads intact. To be sure of payment we did the March and playing. Think traditionally uniformed British brass band marching through a deserted 28 Days Later or post bombing film set and you get the idea.[/quote]
Were you marching between rubble piles or had it already been hauled away?

Geordie · by **Geordie** » 2020-05-18 1:38 p.m.

[quote="JohnL"]Were you marching between rubble piles or had it already been hauled away?[/quote]
It varied along the route, piles in some places, flat in others. The roads were clear. We were the only people I recall seeing. :idk:

JohnL · by **JohnL** » 2020-05-18 2:45 p.m.

[quote="Geordie"]It varied along the route, piles in some places, flat in others. The roads were clear. We were the only people I recall seeing. :idk:[/quote]
Sounds quite post-apocalyptic.

brumpone · by **brumpone** » 2020-05-18 5:58 p.m.

Scotswood or Elswick? Either way, it was certainly more apocalyptic before it was flattened!

Geordie · by **Geordie** » 2020-05-18 6:06 p.m.

[quote="brumpone"]Scotswood or Elswick? Either way, it was certainly more apocalyptic before it was flattened![/quote]
:lol: Elswick and, yes, you are right.

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